Winning Without Wreckage: Fuel High Performance Sustainably
"Anger, fear, aggression—the dark side of the Force are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight."
- Yoda
Today’s newsletter is for you if you know there’s more inside of you. If you’re one of the people among us who dream of doing something big, who are in the thick of it right now, or who have already climbed the mountain and are looking for the next peak.
Tell me if any of this resonates… for years I felt this way myself, and I’m curious if you feel it too:
You’re certain you’re capable of more—more achievement, more success, more impact.
At the same time, you’d like to get there without sacrificing yourself in the process. You want it to lead to contentment and satisfaction, not just the pull of needing more or keeping up.
But you’re not sure that’s possible. You’ve always been motivated by the lack of something:
Not strong enough.
Not wealthy enough.
Not enough control.
Not… enough.
And maybe that motivation isn’t doing it for you anymore. You don’t want self-doubt, self-criticism, or fear of failure to be your fuel anymore. It’s too exhausting, too all-consuming.
You know you want a change, but you also don’t know another way.
So, if you’re like most people, you just… keep going. You keep using the only jet fuel you know. Because the last time you stopped using it, you started losing altitude. And that’s not who you are. You are an upward-moving creature.
And sometimes it works, but sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes it explodes. There might be arguments, resentful children, lost relationships, lost jobs, or lost opportunities. You feel trapped—between the success you want and the only way you know how to get there.
And you know, deep down, that the cost might be too high.
If that’s where you’re at — if you know that jet fuel is ultimately toxic, but it’s the fuel that got you here and you don’t know what to replace it with — I’ve got to tell you:
The way we push ourselves matters.
When we rely on these toxic motivators for too long, they don’t just drive us forward. They also hollow us out.
I know this because I lived it.
If you feel this way, trust me: you are not alone. There are so many people out there, dealing with the same exact thing.
And I’ve been one of them.
I’ve been where you are.
For years, I ran on a potent mixture of that toxic jet fuel coupled with massive aspirations and learning for years, and it got me far. Multiple Olympics when I should have quit a decade before. Olympic Gold. Building a business that for a few years, I should have let go of. Sitting at the table with the most powerful decision-makers in sports. Walking the halls of Congress.
So yeah, it worked for a while. But much of what motivated me was that same toxic jet fuel: Fear. Scarcity. Self-doubt. Pressure. Proving myself to others, and to myself.
And 25 years in, around the age of 40, I simply stopped gaining altitude. I wasn’t getting better anymore — not at work, not in my physical training, not with my health, not with my knowledge. I flat-lined. I lost my urgency, my drive. The toxic jet fuel stopped working.
And then, eventually, it took me down. From upward trajectory, to flat for a few years, to off a cliff in a few months.
That was my breaking point, as I described with David Epstein on Slate’s “How To” podcast. That was when depression grabbed hold of me. And I made a promise to myself—and to my family—if I made it out of that place, I’d never go back there.
But that left me with a question I couldn’t ignore.
If I wasn’t going to fuel myself with fear, pressure, and self-doubt—what was going to propel me upwards?
Because I still wanted to win. I still wanted to build, to grow, to make an impact.
So I started working—just as hard as before, but this time on something different.
I dove deep into the ingredients of the jet fuel, much of which I’ve been writing about for years now. What I learned shook up a lot of my assumptions. For example, did you know:
Fear of failure triggers a surge of stress hormones that sharpen focus and drive us forward, but over time, it wires our brains for chronic anxiety and burnout (American Psychological Association).
Scarcity can make us hyper-focused, but it also causes tunnel vision, leading to poor decision-making and an inability to think long-term (Harvard Business Review).
Self-doubt can push us to prepare harder, but when it’s the primary driver, it leads to mental exhaustion and higher risks of anxiety and depression (Mayo Clinic).
No wonder I’d been burning myself out.
I realized, I didn’t need to hone my skills nearly as much as I needed to hone my method of motivation.
With this understanding, I worked to transition away from almost all of the toxic jet fuel, and to replace it with something different. A new energy source. Something sustainable, something renewable.
What I learned was life-changing — and it might change your life too:
World-class motivation and decision-making doesn’t have to come from the toxic jet fuel.
You don’t have to run on fear to sharpen your focus and push yourself forward—there’s a way to fuel high performance that’s healthier and, in reality, even more powerful.
You don’t have to rely on scarcity to stay driven—you can train your mind to tap into hyper-focus and make better decisions through simple, repeatable daily practices.
You don’t have to let self-doubt keep you on edge—you can prepare relentlessly, stay curious, and bring the ultimate discipline when you know exactly where you're going.
Because the best fuel isn’t fear. It can come from clarity. From purpose. From knowing exactly who you are and why you’re doing what you do.
In fact, it should.
The trick is, you can’t find that kind of motivation unless you know what you’re looking for. Unless you’ve been there before to know if you’re matching it or not.
But when you learn how to access your best power source—the sustainable, non-toxic kind of motivation—you’ll be amazed at what you can do.
I still push myself. I still set the bar high. I still demand excellence. But now, I do it without the wreckage. I’ve built a system that fuels high performance without the burnout, the emotional collateral damage, or the endless cycle of never-enough.
I know it works. Because I’m living proof. So are my clients who tell me this approach has transformed their lives. And it’s no surprise—because there’s decades of physiological and psychological research behind it.
Yet too many people are working on the wrong things, listening to the wrong voices, pushing themselves harder when the real solution lies elsewhere.
I consider myself incredibly fortunate. On the road to living my dreams—both in sport and in building an organization of legacy—I worked with the absolute best coaches, mentors, and minds I could have asked for.
I never expected such incredible people to believe in me, invest in me, and push me to grow the way they did. And for that, I’m both grateful and forever changed.
From ten years with Stu McMillan—a coach to over 80 Olympians and 30+ medalists, recently featured on the Huberman Lab podcast—to over a decade and running with David Pottruck, who grew Charles Schwab from $5B to over $1T, was named CEO of the Year, and whom I skied black diamonds with in Utah just last month.
From Precision Nutrition's Jon Berardi, to Xbox’s Robbie Bach, to so many more that include teammates no longer with us like Steven Holcomb and Pavle Jovanovic.
My mindset, my knowledge, and my skills have been shaped by people considered to be the very best. And that’s why I’m dedicating myself to helping others find a better way to achieve their biggest goals.
It’s why I’m writing the book I’m working on right now.
It’s why I handed off Classroom Champions to focus on a new venture.
And it’s why I launched Mesler Performance Group last fall—because I’m now ready to open up my coaching practice to new clients for executive and performance coaching, as well as team, corporate, and event speaking.
Who I’m Looking to Work With
I’m making space for:
Three new clients in my ultra high-performance coaching group (CEOs, Founders, Partners, Doers, and Builders).
Three new clients in my next-gen high-performance coaching group (for those ready to step up and put in the work to get there).
Three new clients in my athlete/artist high-performance mindset coaching group.
Two new ELT/C-Suite teams in my high-performing team group coaching program.
One keynote, fireside chat, leadership retreat, or high-impact event per month where I can help drive transformation.
CLICK HERE TO HAVE A CONVERSATION
So, if you—or your team—are ready for something better…
If you want to keep growing, keep leveling up, and keep winning—without the wreckage…
If you know your best work, your best leadership, your best success is still ahead of you—but you don’t want it to come at the cost of yourself, your mental health, your physical health, your family, or your people…
Then let’s go.
It’s possible.
And I’m here to help.
- Steve
